my favorite animals, the oxford comma and you

This post is not about Vampire Weekend, though to answer their question it’s me who gives a cares a great deal about an Oxford comma.  In fact today’s entire discourse is about commas. Well… commas, grammar and syntax and sentence structure.  Do you see what I did there?  I left out the serial comma and the contents of this post are not quite so clear, are they?

The Oxford (or serial) comma is the comma which appears immediately before the coordinating conjunction in a list of three or more items.  You can see it below in red.

Ex.)  My favorite animals are pumas, unicorns, leprechauns, and books about turtles.

unity is merely a symptom

image courtesy of free-extras.com

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[In conjunction with Rachel Held Evans' "Rally to Restore Unity."]

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I am amused.  

While I am (mostly) in control of my own blog — I decide what subjects to address, how to write about them, when to publish my thoughts, which photos to accompany them, etc — it is ultimately the reader who decides how my blog will be used.

Why am I thinking about this today?  Because of yesterday’s post:

5 reasons kjv readers aren’t celebrating

It was a satire piece.  I used the 400-year anniversary of the King James Bible to poke fun at some of the arguments conservative Christianity uses to combat Christmas, Halloween, and other popular holidays.

The post was intended as comedy.  Humor.  [And was accepted as such.]  I suppose you could say there was a point.  I was indeed speaking to some larger issues, but mostly I felt like laughing.  So I wrote a piece that made me snicker.

**********

So why am I amused?

Because the post has generated intelligent discussion.  Not concerning the issue I was parodying, but having to do with language constructs and the like.*  That’s as funny to me as the post was to begin with.  [This is possibly commentary, however, on how humorous the original post was -- or, rather, was not.]

I’m not at all upset with the discussion that follows the KJV post.  I am, as I said, amused.  

The writer in a public forum has complete control over his written words, but very little control over how those words are received.  And even less control (practically none) over the discussions that flow from his work.

Is it any wonder, then, that we have myriad interpretations of practically every passage in the Bible?  Are we surprised our churches read the same words but take from them wildly dissimilar meanings?  So what’s a Christian to do?

**********

Scripture teaches that unity is a function of the Holy Spirit.  It is the Spirit’s responsibility to “guide [us] into all truth;”** unity is his endeavor.  It is our task, then, to be obedient to Christ’s teachings as the Spirit nurtures us, the body of Christ, to maturity.

While personally I believe modern Christianity places too much emphasis on the individual, personal saviors, and the like (surely a product of our American culture), the Spirit does play this role on both macro- and micro- levels.  The church as a whole will be built up to maturity by the Spirit’s power and leading.  But also we as individuals, the Spirit indwelling each of us, will become more like Christ as the Holy Spirit guides us into obedience to Jesus’ teachings.

Unity is the result.  Not the goal.

 

“By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”  – John 13:35

We don’t love one another in order to be disciples.  Rather, our love for one another is a symptom of our condition — that we are disciples of Christ.

I’m slightly uncomfortable, then, with the popular view that unity is equal to tolerance.  Unity is not the result of broad-mindedness.  It is the result of obedient lives, changed by the Holy Spirit to be more like Christ.

Seek obedience to Christ.  Unity will come.

[For a very practical approach to unity and obedience, see:  spiritual potty training and christian unity.]

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* Go read some of these comments – you’ll likely learn something.
** John 16:13 

looking forward — top 10 posts of 2011

Don’t Look Back — It’d Be Immature of You

Now, I can’t control what every other blogger in the world is doing (oh, if only I could…).  I can, however, tell you what they’re all up to these days.  And that is: reviewing their top 10 blog posts of 2010.  I’m not going to suggest this is a fruitless endeavor, or that I’m above such.  But it is backward-thinking at best, and resting on one’s laurels at worst.  And here at aliens and strangers, we want to be about the future — not the past. Yep, no laurels for us (literally, there are no laurels on which for us to rest).  After all, Paul did say…

There’s one thing that I do:  I forget what’s in my past and I comtemplate what’s ahead…  Anyone who’s mature should do the same. — Philippians 3:13-15 (taken completely out of context and summarized by me)

And we all want to be mature, right?  So I’m not going to do this “Top 10 Posts of 2010″ thing.  Instead, I’m going to offer you up my top 10 posts of 2011.  Seriously.  [I can't link to them yet, of course, as they've not yet been written.  But still... here they are.]

Top 10 Posts of 2011 — aliens and strangers

1.  auburn wins the national championship

Yep, this one will be posted tomorrow.

2.  10 steps to a successful blog

This will be a satire piece.  I may not know successful blogging — but I do know satire.

3.  i left my wallet in el segundo

Music I remember from my childhood, and how it helped me become the man I am today.

4.  10 things i have to do on furlough

Christie and I will return to the states in August of this year for about three months.  Our (my) goals are to visit family and friends (many have not met Baylor), encourage and be encouraged by our sponsoring churches, participate in a few great opportunities for continuing education, and accomplish these ten things.

5. 10 mistakes i’m afraid we’ll make on furlough

Lots of things can go wrong during a 3-month visit in the U.S.  Ranging from the occasional embarrassing cultural faux pas to legitimate and problematic blunders, this post will be a top 10 list of my biggest fears.

6. a post / series on discipleship which doesn’t yet have a title

This series is currently being written by John King, one of my mentors and shepherds at Stones River Church (our sending congregation).  He is a gifted teacher, and I think of him as my own personal expert on discipleship.  Soon he’ll be yours.

7.  why i am a member of the church of Christ

From a page out of Dr. Leroy Brownlow’s (in)famous book, in this post I’ll explain a bit about the church of Christ, my own religious heritage, what I appreciate most about it, and why I’m a member of this “movement.”

8.  an ode to bacon

This is SO self-explanatory.

9.  silly abbot, pixar’s for kids

I have no idea what this post is going to be about.  I just really liked it as a title.

10. ??????????

This is where I need your help.  Please feel free — encouraged even — to give me ideas for blog posts (you’d like to read) in the comments section below.  I’m happy to accept suggestions for subject matter or even just possible titles of posts.  If you’d like to read more Bible study material or poetry or short stories or top 10 lists — or if you just want me to shut up and leave the whole blog idea alone — let me know.  I’d also be delighted to hear what you think has and hasn’t worked on aliens and strangers.

Which of these posts are you most looking forward to in 2011?  And what’s your idea for post #10?

brett’s morning blend (04jan11)

The Gender Debate: Women in Church Leadership

Interesting discussion over at The Gospel Coalition on complementarian versus egalitarian views of church leadership.  The writer is a complementarian and wonders if scripture isn’t enough — on its own — to settle the discussion.

Homosexuality and Derek Webb

Stephen Altrogge writes about Webb’s recent interview in the Huffington Post.  He talks about homosexuality, sin in general, and reaching out to the lost.

How to Write About Africa

This is one of the best satire pieces I’ve read on Africa.  I’ve included below several of the essay’s tips on writing about Africa.  [Each is a direct quote.]

• Note that ‘People’ means Africans who are not black, while ‘The People’ means black Africans.
• Never have a picture of a well-adjusted African on the cover of your book, or in it, unless that African has won the Nobel Prize. An AK-47, prominent ribs, naked breasts: use these.
• In your text, treat Africa as if it were one country.
• Establish early on that your liberalism is impeccable, and mention near the beginning how much you love Africa, how you fell in love with the place and can’t live without her.
• Among your characters you must always include The Starving African, who wanders the refugee camp nearly naked, and waits for the benevolence of the West.
• Avoid having the African characters laugh, or struggle to educate their kids, or just make do in mundane circumstances. Have them illuminate something about Europe or America in Africa.

Bacon Healed by Jesus

image courtesy of jesusneedsnewpr.net

Obvious Scientific “Discoveries”

Scientists were paid money in 2010 to “discover” that waitresses with bigger breasts get bigger tips.  Others were paid to find that little boys tend to like playing with cars while girls prefer dolls.  Oh, and lest we forget, performance-enhancing drugs enhance performance.

Only the Coolest “Game” Ever

This engineering / woodworking site offers visitors a free online test to determine how good you are at eyeballing right angles, midpoints of lines, and the like.  It’ll take you 3-4 minutes total, and your score is measured in average units of error (low scores are better).  I probably shouldn’t brag, but (in seven games) I scored a 2.17 on my first try, my best was a 1.76, and my average was a 2.07.  See if you can beat me….

 

but not the hippopotamus

The other day I read a book to Baylor that was new to me.  But Not the Hippopotamus is now one of my very favorite children’s stories.  However, I am puzzled as to why the author chose to begin the story in this way:

A hog and a frog cavort in the bog.  But not the hippopotamus.

Cavort?!  Since when is that a kid word?*  Not that I’m opposing the use of it by toddlers around the world — it just strikes me as odd.  How about:

• A hog and a frog play in the bog.
• A hog and a frog dance in the bog.
• A hog and a frog do a jig in the bog.

But cavort?!  We might as well have said:

• A hog and a frog gambol in the bog.
• A hog and a frog carry on with their merrymaking antics in the bog.
• A hog and a frog calculate and pay their federal income taxes in the bog.

Listen, I’ve got nothing against the book — I think it’s great.  Sandra Boynton is a brilliant writer.  There’s even an awesome plot twist at the end.  A surprise ending in a baby book… the woman’s a genius.

But when I want my daughter learning words like cavort,** I’ll sign her up to take the GRE.

* Not that “hippopotamus” is the easiest word in the world…

** But I also have to wonder how often I choose fancy, religious words when a simpler one would do just fine.

the anniversary

Growing up I participated in a lot of public speaking contests — I even won a few.  But, to my knowledge, I’ve never before entered a writing contest.  [I did write for Teenage Christian magazine during college.  And in high school, in place of essays on my AP American History Exam, I turned in poetry.  I wasn't paid much for the TC articles.  And I didn't score high enough for college credit in AP.]

Today, though, I entered my first writing contest.  My brother regularly participates and has (unknowingly, perhaps) inspired me to do the same.  The contest is sponsored by A Word with You Press, and the details are here.  What’s so interesting to me about this contest is that any entry must contain 100 words.  Exactly 100 words.  I’m a sucker for a challenge.  [And I wouldn't mind winning a hundred bucks.]

My entry:

image courtesy of free-extras.com

“THE ANNIVERSARY”

“What’s the secret?  Tell us.”

All eyes were fixed on the couple holding hands, cake and punch in the background.  They’d married in a simpler time, 1959, when a man needed only his family, his farm, and his faith — in that order (though church-going men claimed another on Sundays).

Now 50 years had passed and the crowd, 14 of them grandchildren, looked on with anticipation.

Clara gazed lovingly at Marlon as he motioned with both hands, one still firmly clutching hers, “The secret to a lasting marriage is this…”

“Surround yourselves with family and friends, hold hands, and eat cake.”

You should head over to A Word with You and enter the contest.  [Especially you, Janie.]

one-year anniversary

Today is my anniversary!  Yeah, the blog and I have been together now for exactly one year (hence the paper).  We’ve had our ups and downs and, truth be told, we’re not necessarily in this for better or for worse and in sickness and in health.  Pretty much, first whiff of trouble I get… I’m out of here.  Why do you think we haven’t had any little baby blogs yet?

But I don’t anticipate leaving aliens and strangers anytime soon.  I enjoy it too much.

On November 5th of last year, I posted my first blog entry.  Prior to that day I was writing reports each month and sending them out to everyone who’d subscribed to our mission email list.  Every month I was writing five or six pages of stuff — and having to delete most of it to reach a suitable length for an email.  I was challenged by Ross Kellis to start a blog instead.  I thought and prayed about it.  And what tipped me over the edge was that I wanted to write some kind of Bible studies or devotional thoughts that would allow and encourage discussion; and I didn’t have an outlet for such.  The blog was born.

Asterisks overboard was my first blog post (not necessarily my finest work, but my first post all the same), and was written in the same format as my email reports.  The first post written more in the style of a blog followed the next day — paul’s big mistakes.  And now, here we are at the end of year one.  My regular readers will know I’m not one to write about blog rankings and numbers and the like — I actually never have before today.*  [And, in speaking with a few of you, I've found that some would believe my blog is considerably more "successful" and far reaching than it actually is.]  Today, on my anniversary, I thought I’d post a few stats and a list of the “Top 10 (or 12, depending on how you count it) Posts on Aliens and Strangers.”

 

aliens and strangers

 

Total Visits = 55,000
Current Average per Day = 177
Average per Month = 4,583
Alexa Traffic Rank = 1,919,581
Technorati Rank = 34,751
Technorati Authority = 122

1. Most Visited Post
   
2. Favorite Corruption of Scripture
3. Favorite Satire Piece
4. Favorite (still) Unfinished, Yet Published (anyway), Essay
5. Favorite Advice for Christians Today and part two
6. Missionary Full Disclosure
7. How (not) to Eat With Your Hands — a Photo Tour
8. Best Top 10 List or maybe it’s this one?
9. A Post About Dead Animals
10. How to Study the Bible

Alright, enough of my shameless plugging.  Feel free to do your own in the comments today; I figure it’s only fair.  Which of your blog posts would you most like the rest of us to read?  Leave a link or two.

 

* However, I must admit I had an unhealthy relationship with site stats and page views for the first 4 or 5 months of this blog; I was looking at that stuff almost every day.  The desire to be admired often leads to prostitution and a betrayal of one’s ideals.  And site statistics quickly turn into popularity pornography.  I’ve got a much healthier grasp on all of this these days.

 

of marathons and misinformation: a lesson in tanzanian communication

A few days ago I posted a “review” of the Rock City Marathon, which I ran on Sunday.  I posted my ideas that day from a very western-dominated worldview for two reasons: 1) That is my default setting for thought.  And 2) most of my readers (all six of you) are American and likely think in a similar fashion.

But Jason Miller, super missionary in Mwanza, Tanzania, shared with me some great thoughts over coffee Monday morning about the news article I’d linked to and how it represented so well Tanzanian communication and values.  Then he left on my blog (while I was driving 11 hours) what might have been an intelligent African response to my own post.  There is a lot to be learned about Tanzanian culture from Jason’s few words on the subject.*  So I am reposting his comment here for all to read.  It’s likely that in the next few days, I’ll attempt a western response to Jason’s African one.  But please feel free to respond while proudly wearing your own American values on your sleeve.

Hey Brett,

I see that you replied last at 6:01. Well, since you were staying at my house, at 6:15 you and I were conversing over coffee when I made the comment that your post represented to a T[anzanian] a very western valued (albeit funny) view of the newspaper article from the Guardian. I then said something like, “If someone googles ‘Rock City Marathon’ I bet your blog comes up in the top five.” You were a little mortified by that possibility. Well, I just googled to make sure…and you are number 5.

So, since I’m privy to the information that you’re traveling all day from Mwanza to Dodoma, and being that after that conversation you were concerned and wanted to add an addendum to your post, I’ll post a comment from the viewpoint of your average Tanzanian forming the jist of our conversation in order to way-lay the concerns of those that are of the sociological viewpoint of a Tanzanian. You can add or subtract later, agree or disagree later.

Just so all you readers who are going to want to defend Brett know, Brett and I are good friends.

Considering the several disparaging comments you levied against the staff writer of the Guardian, they all seem to deal on some level with your over-valuing of truth at all costs. You see, as a white-male westerner (as you can only be since you liked the nick-name “The White Mamba”), you value accuracy and truth more than relationship and decency.

Let me explain. You begin by quibbling with the phrase “all the finest runners” and the word “marathon.” Your first questions, as a westerner, are concerned with the accuracy of these statements; whereas as a Tanzanian, you would have had no questions here, since what right-minded person who considers the feelings of others at all would have so coarsely belittled the effort and ability of those involved by directly accusing them of lying. Moreover, we as Tanzanians understand that the article is representing the best hopes of those involved, and has no direct relation to truth whatsoever.

About starting the race at 7am or later, what Tanzanian wouldn’t want to start later? At 7am it is still cold, is it not, being only 68 degrees F? How would one run in all the clothes needed to stay warm at that early hour?

Furthermore, you westerners obsession with time over relationship continues to confound me. You value this impersonal entity, time, more than you value being, as you westerners say, “in the moment.” Westerners like to talk of being “in the moment,” or being mentally present to those who are in front of them for the time they require their attention (regardless of allegiance to time), but in reality your true values are betrayed by the fact that many chance encounters are ended by the fact that a previous engagement has been arranged. Truly western, that: valuing that which is in the future, or, let’s be honest, the possible, more than valuing that which is right in front of you, or, in the most basic meaning, the real.

Did you ever consider that perhaps the Coke driver simply wanted to spend a little more time with his child that morning instead of rushing off to work because of a “previous engagement?”

And then you land back on accuracy concerning numerical reporting, taking to task the “3000″ involved in the race. Yes, of course, there were more like 300 involved, but what right-minded member of a society worth being a member of would value a random number over the intentions and relationships of those involved in planning this great event. So they said 3000 and there were actually 300…so what? Not a single Tanzanian thought there would be 3000. They are again, like good Tanzanians communicating to other Tanzanians, reporting the best intentions of those involved, not the base reality. Everyone in my neighborhood knows that reality is not worth paying attention to, but that it is intention that matters.

Next you’ll want to tell me that we should judge a man by his actions! No, not even you would be that ridiculous. A man’s intentions and the peculiarities of his situation are much more important than his successes. Everyone knows that. Who in Tanzania knows more than one or two people they could name as successful? Or better yet, someone who is successful and can still named as friend? For we all know, with success so often comes a set of compromised morals.

Anyway, at least it seems from your post that you value children. At least, from a sociological standpoint, we have that in common. Jesus, as well, seemed to value them at the expense, even, of others.

Along those lines, even our own writer, Paul, tells us in Ephesians that once we have matured we will be “speaking the truth in love….” Even Paul, that genius of western logic, understands that truth without love was a sign of immaturity.

How about you?

* “Few words” is relative.

7-link challenge

image courtesy of photobucket.com

A couple of weeks ago I came across Bryan Allain’s 7-Link Challenge. He credited Darren Rowse as both his inspiration and the creator of the challenge.  I figure I’ve put a lot of time into my blog, and it wouldn’t be all that bad for me to highlight a few posts from the past — especially on a Saturday.  So here you go — my own 7-Link Challenge:

1.  My first post: paul’s big mistakes

I believe this is one of the most misunderstood texts in the Bible.  Paul says he doesn’t do the things he wants to, and he does do the things he doesn’t want to.  And Christians have read this for years as if it’s the norm for a life in Christ.  It’s not.  And what a sad religion we’d have if it were.  ”Jesus died on the cross, so you could always be disobedient and never have any real control over how you behave and what you do.”

2.  The post I enjoyed writing the most: i’ll have the fruits of repentance — no, the sushi

My favorite posts to write are the modern-day retellings of scripture.  And this is my favorite one of those up to this point.  It comes from Luke 3, and I wouldn’t read it if you love money more than people.  [But if that's the case, you probably should read it... and then you should send me a check, so I can help poor people in Tanzania.]

3.  A post which had a great discussion: missionary predicament: hospitality and rest

This was my first post published to “Freshly Pressed.”  It speaks a bit to the culture of Tanzania as well as to the life of a missionary / development worker.

4.  A post on someone else’s blog that I wish I’d written: The Driven Goatee People Will Inherit the Earth

I’m cheating a little on this one.  I probably don’t actually wish I’d written this particular post, but I just want to give credit where credit is due.  Brant Hansen (a name eerily similar to Brett Harrison) was using this blog last October and November when I first began reading blogs.  And it was Brant who encouraged and inspired me (without knowing) to begin my own blog.  And so… I am here.  This Brant guy is really funny — I wish he was still doing the Kamp Krusty thing.

5.  My most helpful post: church planting: 3-column studies

One of the greatest problems in Christianity today is our lack of obedience.  We tend to study the Bible for knowledge — and, frankly, many of us know entirely too much about the Bible to look so little like Christ.  This post is my best attempt at teaching how to study the Bible for obedience.  If your Bible reading time isn’t what you want it to be, please give this 3-column method a chance.

6.  A post with a title I’m proud of: how to be creative (or “one-red-sock” zoe rides an eagle)

To be honest (and arrogant), I like a lot of my posts’ titles.  So I “eeny-meeny-miny-moed” this junk.  And this is the post that caught a tiger by his toe.  If you want to be a more creative person, you should read this.  [Actually, it probably won't help you -- better you give up and become an accountant.]

7.  A post I wish more people had read: what a father really wants

I wrote this while waiting in Dar es Salaam for Baylor to be born.  Not only does it paint a picture of what I want my baby girl to be like when she grows up, but it presents three simple God truths that I’m afraid we adults have somehow forgotten.  I want to have faith like a child.  Good thing, too, because that’s what Jesus wants for me as well.

this post is not about anne rice

image courtesy of gayguidetoronto.com

…but it is about your obsession with her.

Am I the only person in the world who had no idea who Anne Rice was before she decided to quit organized religion?  Why does this story make such headlines?  Is it because…

• Christians don’t like the idea of a (somewhat and kind of) influential public figure giving up on a large portion of their prized religion — and, therefore, want to prove her wrong?
• Christians don’t like the idea of a (somewhat and kind of) influential public figure giving up on a large portion of their prized religion — and, therefore, want to explain away her actions?
• Christians don’t like the idea of a (somewhat and kind of) influential public figure giving up on a large portion of their prized religion — and, therefore, want to use this opportunity to change the church, so this sort of thing doesn’t happen again?
• Anne Rice actually was and/or is an incredibly powerful and influential leader in Christianity (and I, along with millions of others, just happen to have never heard of her)?*
• Anne represents a large and growing number of Christians who love Christ, but have a certain disdain for church and the institution of religion?
• American media wants to make a big deal of what’s wrong with Christianity?
• there are too many of us writing blogs, and everyone’s looking for something to write about — so pretty much anything will do?
• Americans, in general, are in the middle of a big, fat, nasty love affair with all things vampire?

I’m not trying to knock Anne Rice.  I’m sure her various genre books were great, the “gothic, erotic, and religious-themed” ones.  I realize she is one of modern history’s most popular authors, selling over 100 million books over the past four decades.  And I’m sure much of modern Christianity celebrated her arrival on the scene in 1998 just as they are now denouncing her departure (of sorts).  I’m not trying to say Anne Rice’s soul isn’t important, or that she doesn’t have the ability to influence others.**

I’m just wondering if we weren’t looking for something like this to happen, because we need or want to address the issue.  Are there enough of us leaving Christianity that we were longing to discuss “Jesus versus the church” — and now someone of prominence has jumped ship, and we’re finally able to do so without pointing fingers at family, friends, brothers, and sisters?

As for me, I don’t know that I’m very interested in hearing about half-way famous people quitting Christianity.  However, if the Pope decides to part ways with the church, let me know.  If Rick Warren trades in his faith to become a professional riverboat gambler, I’ll be looking for him on ESPN2.  If Lady GaGa gives her life to Christ and performs Christian-only music videos, only later to renege on her commitment to the Lord in a tweet to all her “Little Monsters,” I’ll be the first in line to blog about it.  But I’ve never heard of Anne Rice.

The conversation about the separation of Christ and his church, though, I’m more than happy to have — and I think it’s both interesting and needed.  But the Anne Rice invitation and appetizer isn’t necessary.  Thank you.

*My wife tells me that, indeed, everyone in the United States HAS heard of Anne Rice.  My wife, however, was an English major — and is smarter than I.  So I believe I represent the average American better than she.  And I say the Pope and Lady GaGa are news;  she says Anne Rice and Tolstoy are news.  Of course she also is the president of the Stephanie Meyer and J.K. Rowling fan clubs.

** Nearly all of my information about Anne Rice has come from that distinguished and acclaimed news source, Wikipedia.