sexy beggars and astronaut pick-up lines

* If you’re actually looking for astronaut pick-up lines or the like, go here.

Lately I’ve become more aware of how people are reaching my blog.  Obviously there are many who are just typing the address into their browser and hitting “enter.”  [Or is it “return?”  Which one is proper these days?  Or are both proper, in which case I should ask which one is popular?  Yeah, what’s the hip way to talk about the “enter” button on a keyboard?  Are there hip ways to talk about keyboards?  Probably there are, at least in some social groups.  If any of you know the answers to these questions, please respond in the comments below — I don’t want to sound like a fool talking about a “return” button… or a “space bar.”  We still call it the “space bar,” right?  That’s a funny name.  Sounds like an astronaut hangout.  “Hi.  Do you come here often?  Can I buy you drink?  How tall is your dentist?”  At least those were always my best come-on lines — you’re right though, astronauts probably use different ones.  At least the ones who frequent space bars.
What I’m sure of is that Neil Armstrong never tried to pick a girl up by talking about keyboards. Help me out here, I’m dying.]

Okay, so where was I?  Aha, people arriving at my blog.  Some people type the address in their browser or have my blog “favorited.”  Others come directly from their email accounts, because they’re subscribed to my blog and get each post by email.  [Which you can also do, by the way, by subscribing over on the right-hand column.]  I’m guessing the bulk of these subscribers skim the posts and only come over to the actual blog if they’re interested in reading or posting comments.  Then there are people who come from their feed readers; they’re subscribed to several different blogs, but read them all in one central location (like google reader or bloglines, etc).  These people also probably only come to my site if they want to read or post comments.

Last, but definitely most enjoyable to me, are the people who come to my blog via search engines. The reason I enjoy this so much is that I get reports on what searches brought readers to my blog.  [Don’t worry, I don’t get reports on who each reader is, whether or not they like my blog, and/or what they are wearing.]  Below are just a few of the searches* that have brought people to aliens and strangers:

Some folks obviously have read the blog before and search for it again.  That or someone told them my name and something about the blog.  I get searches like “James Brett aliens” or “James Brett wordpress” or “aliens and strangers Brett Harrison,” etc.  These are the least interesting to me, though I’m glad people are coming by.

Then there are people who I’m really glad find my site, because they’re searching for answers to spiritual questions or interested in Bible study:

Then there are people searching probably for educational purposes, which are not necessarily spiritual:

Then you’ve got people who like food and candy:

And then, my favorites — some of which can be pretty strange:

Regardless of why you come to my blog, I hope you find what you’re looking for.  That or some good information about aliens who make water in their beds during nap time.  Welcome.

* I’ve included links to where on aliens and strangers one would probably find themselves if arriving through these search terms.  If there is no link, then I have no idea…



Filed under just thinking, slightly humorous or amusing?

4 responses to “sexy beggars and astronaut pick-up lines

  1. Too funny! I love the cornhole one. I don’t know what it is but it reminds me of cornholio from Beavis and Butthead. I am the great cornholio!

    • jeremy, cornhole’s a tailgating game popular in the sec. of other popular games, it’s probably most like horseshoes, though it’s played with beanbags and you’re tossing to a wooden board with a hole in it. a beanbag on the board is 1 pt and in the hole is 3.

      i think it’s probably most similar to a game i’ve heard of called ‘washers,’ which is (if i understand correctly) the texas equivalent. anyway, it’s a good game, partly because it’s portable.

      oh yeah, and i’ve never lost a game of cornhole in africa. yep, been here over a year now.

  2. Daniel

    nap time alien pee pee problems. . . . . .hmmm.

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