bacon and baylor: the makings of a fine father’s day

baylor as a duck -- not a beijing one, just the regular kind

This is my first Father’s Day… as a father.  I slept late, and at this very moment, Christie is making bacon and pancakes.  My wife is an incredible cook.  The only thing she’s ever made that wasn’t delicious was asparagus (I literally ran to the trash can and spit it out) — but that was not her fault (it is absolutely impossible for a mere human being to make asparagus taste good — it requires an act of you-know-who).  However, despite the fact that Christie has great skills in the kitchen, she entered into the holy bonds of matrimony not knowing how to fry a single thing.  I assume it has something to do either with hailing from Virginia or from a family who practiced healthy eating.

Growing up in south Alabama, my family did NOT eat what one would call particularly healthy foods.  Actually there are probably a (very) few people who might call our diet outright unhealthy.  You may not know that we have five major food groups in the deep south:

  • meat
  • casseroles
  • coke (a food group which includes any and all nonalcoholic carbonated beverages)
  • fried stuff (anything from meats to vegetables to snicker bars to the little crispy things leftover after frying any of the aforementioned items)
  • gravy

So, Christie — yeah, Christie had no idea how to fry foods.  She could make a mean lasagna from scratch, and her Greek food was amazing (baklava my favorite).  But she couldn’t cook bacon or fry okra to save a life (or perhaps to kill one) — not when we got married.  But she learned… for me.  Yep, my wife now not only allows me to eat a pound of bacon at a time, but she cooks it for me.  So today, for Father’s day breakfast, I’m eating three pancakes and a pound of bacon.  Lunch is pepperoni and bacon pizza.  And for supper, I’ll unbutton the top of my pants and just swell up, toothpick in hand.  Ah, for a Happy Father’s Day.

A few quotes for your Father’s Day.  To be enjoyed with bacon or fried MoonPies:

  • If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.  –– Bill Cosby
  • A father is a banker provided by nature.  –– French Proverb
  • What a dreadful thing it must be to have a dull father.  –– Mary Mapes Dodge
  • When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.  –– Mark Twain
  • A father is a guy who has snapshots in his wallet where his money used to be. — Unknown
  • The father is always a Republican toward his son, and his mother’s always a Democrat. — Robert Frost
  • The father of a daughter is nothing but a high-class hostage. A father turns a stony face to his sons, berates them, shakes his antlers, paws the ground, snorts, runs them off into the underbrush, but when his daughter puts her arm over his shoulder and says, “Daddy, I need to ask you something,” he is a pat of butter in a hot frying pan. — Garrison Keillor
  • Small boy’s definition of Father’s Day: It’s just like Mother’s Day only you don’t spend so much.  –– Unknown
  • By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.  –– Charles Wadsworth
  • To her the name of father was another name for love. — Fanny Fern

baylor the acrobat -- we're working on her core (for AU volleyball)

I want to be a picture.

Baylor’s over six months old now.  There are so many things I want for her.  I want her to grow up to live life to the fullest — the life God intended for her.  I want her to be honest and hard-working, and compassionate and loving.  I want Baylor to be witty and sarcastic, have my sister’s hair, and go to Auburn on a volleyball scholarship.  But this post isn’t about Baylor.  Today is MY day.*

“What do I want for ME?”  That’s the question.  And I’ve already given you my answer.  I want to be a picture.  A picture of God in the life of my daughter.  I want Baylor to daily see in me the characteristics of our heavenly Father.  I want my life to be a painting of unconditional love and forgiveness, of patience and grace.  I want Baylor’s understanding of God to be grounded in my love for her, which is grounded in the Father’s love for me.  I want my words and actions to be a beautiful display of God’s heart in the life of my daughter.  On this and every Father’s Day, I want nothing more than to be a picture — well, I want that and some bacon… gravy on the side, please.

Happy Father’s Day, dads.

* For more about what I want for my daughter and what I hope she becomes, read what a father really wants, which was written two weeks before Baylor’s (late) arrival.



Filed under family

14 responses to “bacon and baylor: the makings of a fine father’s day

  1. Happy 1st Fathers Day! Enjoy the day with your sweet little girl.

    The Daddy in our home also began the day with pancakes, but no bacon I’m afraid. No pork allowed in the Land of Sand

    • thanks for the father’s day wishes. and tell your husband that i’m REALLY sorry he can’t have bacon… or sausage… or ham. wow, that’d be tough.

      i’m made of 30% pork.

  2. Congrats james on your 1st FD. As the saying goes, “Ain’t nuttin’ like it.” I have 2 grown daughters and while living with 3 women in the same home was challenging at times, I would not trade any of the time or experiences with anyone for anything. Enjoy Baylor now so you can enjoy her more in the future. As for Christie: way to go letting him think he is the man of the house for at least a day. 🙂

  3. That picture of Baylor is so CUTE (the second one, although both are precious). And a big ole Happy Father’s Day to you!

    And poor Jason…because when he married me I knew how to cook cereal and sandwiches. It is a good thing my sis lives 3 miles down the road (and there are such things as telephones) because everything I have ever made (well, except maybe 2 things) came from her. I still call her to ask what I should make when I host a shower of some sort or Bonco at my house. And she offers to make half of it for me.

    I am about to have a LOT of extra time on my hands since NASA’s Constellation Program got canned and that flows down to me next week…so I have decided to learn some new recipes, spend more time in grocery stores, and learn some things. That and iron more of Jason’s clothes so he doesn’t go to work looking like he has no wife. 😉

    • i’m sorry to hear about your job stuff, though i hope you enjoy the extra time you have for cooking (and becoming more proficient on your bicycle). i’m jason will enjoy his freshly starched duds.

      tell julie i said hi next time you call and ask her for cooking advice, would you?

  4. Happy Father’s Day!

    When hubby and I were first married, he wanted to plant a garden so we sat down to plan all the things we wanted to grow (hubby grew up farming) and one of the things I wanted was okra. My dad had grown it in his garden (though dad’s was just a little summer garden, not an acre like hubby was used to) I wanted to fry it and I wanted to pickle it (yum!) Hubby was not keen on growing okra. For one, he had never grown it, and for the other he had had it in a meal somewhere and it hadn’t been cooked right so he remembered it as chewing on a ball of snot. I told him he had not had it cooked right yet and I would fix that. Well, I didn’t get him convinced until he picked the first batch and i fried it rolled in seasoned cornmeal. After that, he was hooked 🙂 Hubby, God bless him, is a yankee. God obviously has a sense of humor.

    Of your quotes, this one is the one that applies to me:

    To her the name of father was another name for love. — Fanny Fern

    • trapper, that’s also the quote i liked best — and so i put it at the end of the list.

      glad you were able to convert your yankee husband and get okra in your garden. it’s such a nice thing to plant, because it basically takes care of itself. it can grow in really hot weather and without much water. and generally it also grows way longer than everything else in a garden…

  5. randy morgan

    a beautiful thought, brett (and exceptionally well-written, by the way). i want to be a picture, too.

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