limericks for christmas

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A few limericks for the Christmas season:

-Pregnant Teen-
There once was an inn with no room,

a pregnant miss, and her soon-to-be groom.
It wasn’t his son,
but he didn’t run.
For ’twas the Savior inside of her womb.

image courtesy of

-It’s Not Sanitary-

In the beginning of it all was the word.

Years later from heaven to earth he transferred.
Born in the hay,
With the animals he lay.
Now isn’t that simply absurd?

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-The Bible Doesn’t Say That-
Some wise men arrived from afar,

The roadmap they followed a star.
We say there were three,
For three gifts there would be.
But guessing and conjecturing we are.

-Obligatory Call To Repentance-

Beautifully wrapped presents lie under the tree,

Our faces stuffed with all the food we can see.
Lots of money we’ve spent,
Yet we’re still discontent.
We might should repent —
That’s why we have Lent.
But is this really all Christmas should be?

Share a Christmas limerick of your own? Β Or a haiku would be equally appreciated…




Filed under poetryish

13 responses to “limericks for christmas

  1. Pingback: A Little Christmas Poetry « Kingdom Bard

  2. Ha! These are great. The first is my favorite.

    • that was my wife’s favorite as well. i’m not sure i have a favorite. but maybe the wise men one? i actually don’t like them as much as i did when i first wrote them… but that’s probably just how limericks go. i should learn how to write REAL poetry.

  3. JMF

    There is an African man named Brett,
    “Three columns” is the name of his pet.
    Eating bacon drinking beer,
    For dolls he doth fear,
    On Oregon smart money places it’s bet.

  4. JMF

    There is a slender man in Geita,
    “A young Joel Osteen” except he’s a writa’.
    And Jew he is not,
    For pork is his lot,
    Dikembe Mutambo just a little bit whita’.

  5. JMF

    There is a man that thinks Christian Leadership is a sin,
    And he thinks megachurches are a sin.
    Church buildings are a sin, too–
    Paying preachers is a sin, too.
    But church growth is the biggest sin.

    This one is my favorite, Brett. πŸ™‚ Merry Christmas to you and yours, bro!

    • thanks for the christmas wishes. and for the beautiful poetry.

      which, by the way, contains NO SARCASM whatsoever. my favorite is the one about pork — well, it’s not all about pork, but you know what i mean.

      merry christmas.

  6. Jason Miller

    How about a multi-lingual limerick:

    “Wise men” they are called, from the east.
    For God a bright star to them bequeathed.
    But here they’d be bafumu*,
    For us, that’s pretty kigumu**,
    So let’s forget it and have ourselves a feast.

    *Sukuma for witchdoctor, shaman, or traditional healer
    **Swahili for difficult
    ***I just wanted to have a three-starred note to emulate Brett. Even we super missionaries have to have role models.

  7. jay @ bethegospel

    The shepherds heard the angels sing,
    And the bright light was a bit of a sting.
    They shared the great news
    To these lowly little Jews.
    And this message to the town they did bring.

    I liked yours better though. πŸ™‚

  8. How fun are those?
    The title to the second one is craking me up.

    In a stable a King was born.
    One who would endure contemptuous scorn.
    His life he freely gave.
    For those he would save.
    We no longer need be forlorn.

    Merry Christmas to the Harrisons!

  9. Pingback: A Little Christmas Poetry

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